When asked recently to share some strategies for tough times, I was surprised to learn that very few of the people I queried on the topic actually had strategies and matching plans for the tough times we are facing today. Is it because we are so used to the rapid pace of change that we just allow ourselves to be swept away by it as we get older? Or is it that some of us feel we are experienced enough to manage? Maybe some of us are just so paralyzed by the imminent disaster that we are not able to think!
Let us look at some of the issues in more detail. I like to start with FEAR. Fear renders us incapable of thinking straight, of devising an escape, and we become like the frog in the water that is being heated and discovers too late that it is going to be cooked! The mechanics of fear and the influence (in the long term) on the brain is well documented. Living under the constant stress of the unknown, the stress of the inevitable impending disaster and the feelings of shame and guilt that often overcome us, the brain is physically modified. In “Destructive Emotions - and how we can overcome them”, Goleman recounts discussions between the Dalai Lama and several important scientists and explains how fear and anger disable our ability to reason. It makes sense: when you are being set up for lunch by a lion, there is no reason to think, there is only reason to run! If we are constantly bombarded by fear and negative emotions, the brain is modified physically, impairing memory, lowering our ability to fight off disease, etc. Being able to balance the negative emotions with positive images and stories, with laughter, resets the situation. Emotionally intelligent people have the ability to balance the negative and the positive and in this way regain control over the frontal lobe activities related to logic. Logic allows us to see fear and other negative emotions for what it is, and allows us to inspect the reasons for our misery. Only then can we consider the strategies and plans to overcome it.
The first part of our strategy is to cultivate positive images and thoughts on a regular basis and to consider the good things in our lives, even in the darkest moments. Read a good uplifting book, work in the garden, play with a dog or a cat, meditate, pray, go for a long walk and look for the beauty of nature around you, blank out the ugly, look at the bark of a tree and brush your hands over the bristly leaves of a conifer.
Once your brain is ready for the ideas to flow freely, get into action, WORK. “Work?”, you ask, “Is that not what causes so much misery?”. David Whyte writes in his astonishingly beautiful “Crossing the Unknown Sea: Work as a Pilgrimage of Identity”: “Why are the stakes so high in our work? Why do we work long hours, ignore our children, neglect our spouse, spend enormous amounts of time away from home, and, at worst, stoop to theft, bribery, threats, and bullying to get things done?” And then: “ The one who refuses to forget their humanity and in remembering, helps everyone else to remember, too.” This is the key, work, any kind of work, volunteer work, your chosen career, work at the church on Sundays, all of these things are in fact opportunities to contribute to your fellow man, to act humanely, to go outside of the self and into the domain of those with needs around you and to help them. This is the counter-trend! Reaching out through work is powerful. It gives meaning to your being here, lifts the image of the self, adds worth to every second spent alive. Laced with the humanity of a smile, a joke at your own expense, a tender word, a touch and sometimes a quiet tear in deep sympathy, it becomes the wings of freedom for your brain to act in the most positive way of all - innovation.
The second part of our strategy is to work with a positive attitude in a servant manner so that you can see the opportunities for innovation. Even if you have lost your job, do not stay at home, get to the nearest community centre and volunteer, help the neighbours with something, contribute to the lives of others. It is strange how opportunity comes knocking when you are in good spirits.
Once you are focussed outside of yourself, you can start to make plans to move on, to turn the tough times into prosperous times for you and those around you. Working as a volunteer while your car is being repossessed has a negative impact on you and your ability to help others. One must be practical. I have learnt that one must have two plans at any given time. If plan A fails, move to plan B and promptly devise plan C and possibly even D. The first thing to do is to get to grips with what you have now squarely identified as your specific set of problems. Remember, standing back and working with others in a giving way and cultivating positive energy inside and outside yourself allowed you to see the issues you face for what they are, problems that can be surmounted by logic and planning.
“Where do I start though?”. By looking at the problems one by one and even if they are not linked, trying to find the one that, once resolved, will bring the biggest relief. However, this is not as obvious as it seems. Sometimes one can start with something that is fully under your control, just to show that you can take control. Give up something that is costly, like smoking or drinking excessive amounts of beer, or Coke. You have enough incentives: money, health, but above all, control over something.
In “Innervation - redesign yourself for a smarter future” Guy Browning tells us that creativity starts by standing back and looking anew at your circumstances. Identify what it is that prevents you from getting to where you want to be from where you are now. List these things. Ian Woodrow starts here in his brilliant little book “Close… but no cigar - six easy steps to solving business problems” and states that these are the little critters that must be sorted out. Within a few pages he develops a great strategy to understand the problems. With this under control, you can plan a course of action that will take you to the envisaged state in the future. The trick is to try and estimate the risks, those things that you must manage closely to ensure success. If possible, devise at least two plans to get to your goal, or even slightly different goals, but both desired destinations (maybe one is less desirable than the other, but both are much better states to be in than where you are now). Take cues from your work with other people, as their advice as well. Lastly, write down the plans with dates and milestones so that you can work towards fixed goals. If you miss a milestone, stand back, evaluate the problem, modify the actions, try again, ask for help, etc. If all else fails (sometimes the environment changes again), switch plans. Be positive.
Having a plan and putting it into action is the third essential part of the strategy.
Lastly, give yourself credit for taking control of the situation. Smile about the things that did not work according to the plan, and devise new plans. This is learning. It changes your filters of perception and allows you to see new opportunities. Sometimes we see so many opportunities that we forget to focus on our original goals. Stand back and decide that focus is needed. Some plans must actually be executed to conclusion before you will benefit from them. The best way to stay focussed is to devise an end-state that is not too materialistic, and also not too emotional and lofty. An end state is often a short paragraph, written as a story, telling you what it will be like to be in the desired state. With this fixed in your mind you can focus and evaluate progress properly. There is no secret here, no magic, just plain old common sense.
The final part of the strategy consists of focus and perseverance. Pin your ears back and race towards the finish line with all your might and do not be distracted by the wooly mammoths of fear and self-doubt!
Personally I set small short term goals and my long term plans are rather audacious. It must be worthwhile to embark on the journey, with a goal at the end that forces me to look up, otherwise the stones in the road may become boulders from where I stand.
The image at the top is from iStockPhoto. I bought the rights to it, and so should you if you want to use it.
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